TTIWWOP, Part II
So. I have a leg. A right leg, to be specific. And it has this bruise on it. Which, after these pictures, might well be entitled The Great Bruise of 2006.
The Bruise, on Friday.
The Bruise, again Friday.
The Bruise, Saturday.
The Bruise, today: OH MY GOD A BLACK, FLESH EATING VIRUS HAS CONSUMED MY ENTIRE THIGH. AND NOW MY KNEE.
I tried to show my bruise to my roommate and landlord, M, and his boyfriend. I was all enthusiastic. "HI GUYS! Want to see my BRUISE?"
Their lips curled, much like the smoke from their cigarettes. "Um. No."
Me: "TOO DAMN BAD. I will show you anyway, and you will LOVE it."
I unzipped, pulled down my jeans, and showed them. I believe my landlord's face actually turned green. "Um. Okay. Ow."
What he didn't say: "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WOMAN. I did not choose a lifetime of hardship and heartache, looking at beautiful sculpted boys, just so I could be forced to look at YOUR PASTY-WHITE FLAB. PLEASE PUT IT AWAY."
On the other hand, the LT, a guy with both his fair share of bruises AND inordinate interest in my thighs, is only too happy to give his opinion of my bruise every time I show him.
Something tells me I chose wisely.
6 comments:
Must... poke... eyes... out...
I wouldn't call that pasty-white!
Right. It's not pasty white, it's black and blue! But amy, you are too kind.
Uscar: who cares what you think, anyway?
if I may be so bold to pry... what caused such a lovely bruise??
signed, she who's had her fair share of bruises, but never one of such sheer size!
Hi RG--fortunately I talk all about it in my post, "My Thigh Meets the Canadian Rockies. All of Them."
Details, here we come!
wow! now that is something to be proud of! I got the best bruise ever while snowboarding so maybe something about snowsports delievers such high quality, colorful injuries...
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