Two Steps Forward...

"It's ironic," I said, on the phone with Chalie.

"I have this boyfriend who has spent the last several years without credit cards. He doesn't even have a debit card on him. He only buys things through cash."

"Okay..."

"So thanks to his excellent example, I've started leaving my American Express at home."

"Oh yeah? Any particular reason?"

"Well, to help pay off my debt," I said, rather shamefacedly. "It's going down slowly but surely, and I thought going on a cash system would help."

"That's great!" she said, politely ignoring the fact that I ought not to have any debt at all, and that my debt roughly totals--or used to total--how much she actually makes in a year. "How's it going?"

"Well, I have one credit card on me--it has a $500 limit, so I can't go crazy with it."

"Okay..."

"...and I'm at a gas station, and...my credit card is maxed out. I've paid the dang thing online, but it hasn't gone through yet."

"Oh."

"And the Tank is seriously on fumes. I can't get another ten miles."

"Uh...didn't this happen to you once before? You got stranded at a gas station with an empty bank account and an empty tank?"

"Yes. But that was a long time ago and I think Mom would not be as inclined to bail me out, this time."

"Uh...don't you have a debit card?"

"...It's in the mail. I lost my original one and they're replacing it."

"Oh for GOD'S sake," she said, exasperated. "What are you going to do?"

"Oh, I have a cash card. I can't buy things with it, but I can get cash."

"Oh. So you're okay."

"Oh, yeah. I have just have to walk into the store and hit the ATM before I try to buy gas."

"Okay. So WHAT, exactly, is ironic?"

"Suddenly I have money--paying down my debt and everything--and suddenly I can't get to it."

"Uh huh," she said, her voice dripping with ice crystals. "You. Poor. Thing."